RITUAL: Self-love, Letting Go & Releasing Old Shit


Letting go can be one of the hardest things we have to do in life. Just like our positive experiences, negative ones help mold who we are, what decisions we make and how we react or respond to situations and people. 

Now that I've manifested my sanctuary and now dwell in my happy place (more on that later), I've been looking to different areas of my life that could now use some cleansing and healing - one being the heart. What a lot of us don't realize is that we carry our past pains with us and they weigh us down. All the heartbreak, the abuse we endure from previous lovers, the shame of doing things that we know is against our highest and greatest good. That emotional turmoil can manifest itself physically and more times than not, we'll see that manifest in our sacral chakra  which is connected to our sexuality, creativity, passion and personal power. 

I decided to do a letting go ritual the other night to release old pain and hurt, and welcome in love and value of Self. I like to do my rituals at night and work with the feminine energy of the moon. I also like to set the tone and play some music, usually a jazz & blues playlist when working my magic. My favorite playlist of all time to use during my rituals is the Queen Sugar Soundtrack. A huge bank of blues, jazz and rock music that will help you zone out and focus on your intent. Other awesome playlists that I love to work with are the BLK Vintage Cool from BLK MKT Vintage or the Boys and Girls album by Alabama Shakes. 

First things first, set the stage. I have yet to buy a rug for my living room so my blanket had to do. I placed six white candles in a circle. In between each candle, I placed rose quartz stones and two quartz crystals at each side of where I was seated. I also lit candles on my windowsill and around the room. The number six is connected to Gaia, the ultimate nurturer, and giver of unconditional love. Six also symbolizes that of heart and home, loving relationships of all kinds and compassion and empathy. 

Grab your smudging tools like your sage and palo santo (I used both, but you don't have to). Don't forget your abolene shell or a fire safe dish (PLEASE BE CAREFUL!!!). I also like to use incense and further cleanse my space, myself and ignite my senses. And lastly, you'll need one red candle, a journal and a blue pen or sharpie. Red is the color of the root chakra and pure energy. Think of it... the blood women shed during their moon cycles, when women give birth. Red is the color of renewal and birth and we're working on renewal of Self and Spirit. 


During the July New Moon, I made a Self-Love & Heart Healing Intention Oil, which worked out perfectly for this ritual. I made sure to grab it to infuse into my ritual and daily practice moving forward. While using the Heart Healing oil is not necessary for this ritual, it gives an added spark to your magic and intention setting, so I suggest snatching a bottle for yourself! If you're not sure how to work my intention oils, you can go [LINK] to learn how to manifest and work with my oils. 

Now sit in your sacred space. Cleanse it and yourself with your sage, followed by your palo santo. The Sage works to cleanse any unwanted or stagnant energy and the palo santo will swoop in after to bring blessings into your space. Light your incense - I used Rose for this ritual, since we're bringing in a whole lot of love for Self. 

It's time for some candle magic. Taking your Heart Healing and Self-Love oil, rub it on the one candle in front of you. Light the other ones and leave the oil infused candle for last. Save the red on for later. Closing my eyes, I start off with a prayer, addressing God, my ancestors and guides, asking that they join me in my sacred space and guide me to a place of contentment and love. I spoke of my intentions and asked for their help and guidance. Right now is the time to just focus on your breathing and connecting to the Divine. 

Now you're going to take a sheet of paper and write down all of the things you are releasing from your life in order to start healing the heart chakra. BE SPECIFIC. Don't be ashamed either. Be as honest and open as you can be. Jot down the names of exes, experiences that hold you back, attitudes and habits that continue to block heart healing and love. Let it all out!! Now is your chance! God, the ancestors, your spirits are with you and waiting to see exactly what you need help with. 

Once you're finished, take the list and fold it up. Light your red candle and light the paper using its flame. Put it in your abolene shell. While the list is burning, visualize all the hurt and pain, all the habits, all the conditioning being released from yourSelf. Visualize freedom. 

Now that the list is gone, start writing some affirmations, like...

I love myself unconditionally

I am enough

I do not need someone else in order to be happy


I like to put my affirmations in the reminder section of my iPhone and set timers for them all. I like the daily reminder to stop what I'm doing to say my affirmations. My daily life can get a bit stressful so this helps to ground and remind me to sprinkle a little love on myself.

Next step, is to set some intentions. Along with your affirmations, set some intentions for yourself, that you can do moving forward to really implement some self-love and self-care into your life. When you're done with your list, sign and date it and tuck it away somewhere where it won't be disturbed and stumbled upon. I like to keep my intentions in a dresser drawer or somewhere near my altar. 

I like to close out with a prayer, giving thanks to God and my guides for always providing and lighting my path. Let me know if you give this ritual a try! Share your experiences in the comment section below. 


all my love <3